Friday, January 21, 2005

Poetry...

A lot has been said about my poetry skills by others, but whats better than the words from the horse's mouth? So here it goes...

For many people, poetry is supposed to be some lines composed by using bombastic words, cryptic language that you cannot understand, hidden meanings that only your english teachers can decipher and teach you.

I was introduced to poetry by my 7th std English teacher, Mrs. Lalitha Chandrasekhar, whom I had the opportunity to meet last Oct, and she was overjoyed at hearing about it, even though she was lucky enough to not see any of my poetry...Then I liked it (esp Daffodils by William Wordsworth) and there started a thread of thought...It continued a bit in my school days, but the real thrust came in my college days. I became famous and infamous at the same time, and there were lots of inspirations to write more and more. So it continued...And even now, I write only when I get some inspiration.

I wanted mine to be different from the usual stereotype. The first thing that captured my mind about poetry is rhyming words. I loved the simple yet awesome effect it had on me. It always brought a smile in my face. I remembered then, the essence of using rhyming words in nursery rhymes. It really does make us smile, and is easy to remember. Maybe I am still a child, but I like it that way...I remember my teacher, Mrs. GV once said "To write better English, you have to think in English". So, I began to think in rhyming words.

I dare say its unconventional. I wanted to keep poetry simple (1 reason is that my vocabulary is limited) cos I wanted everyone to read it and get the meaning. I dint want them referring dictionaries to figure out whats in there. Even a 2nd std kid can understand my poetry. Ofcourse, whether people think its good or bad is beyond my control.

First thought of anyone who reads my poetry is that its childish and its too long. My problem is that once I start writing, its hard for me to stop. Some of the poems I write for fun because of something I juz wanna say and it comes out as rhyming. Those are definitely short (or shorter than my usual length). But the poems I really write seriously are due to issues that affect me a lot and things about which I want to express myself. For me, poetry is just my way of expressing my thots as words....So the more I am concerned about something (or someone ;) ), the more lines it occupies on the computer notepad.

Coming to others' opinion of my poetry, 60% of the people boo it in public, 40% appreciate it in public, 20% actually change their opinion of my poetry after a while, but almost all appreciate it in private...I like the negative comments, cos those makes me realise whats wrong and improve, I like the positive comments a little lesser, cos I feel its just an acknowledgement, and I definitely avoid any overdose of it. Also I know many people out there can write much better. So, I dont waste an opportunity to read something better than mine or different than mine and appreciate it.

Well, it seems ironic, but 3 of what I consider my worst poems were published in the Int'l library of poetry for the last 3 years and my profile has been included in the Int'l whos who in Poetry. I submitted those cos they were the only ones lesser than 20 lines (a pre-requisite). Anywayz, I dont think much abt such stuff. My poetry is purely for my pleasure (of writing it) and others (for reading it).

But the bottomline is that I dont change my style just cos its not the usual style. I take my poetry seriously, as in the end, the whole point of it is that I want people to recognise the meaning it contains...even though in a much lighter manner than most of the poems out there...

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The search has just begun !!! (for yet another attempt at reading something better than mine)

Going with the Flow...

I am prejudiced. I do some things just for the heck of doing it... But one thing I have always tried to avoid is going with the flow...I never am the one to do things just because others did it...

Some flows I have seen in my life and what I did....

Have to study in a well-recognised school (Had no control)

Have to take up tuitions to do well in board exams (Refused, cos I knew I could perform with what I learnt in skool)

Have to go for IIT classes to get into IIT (Accepted, cos I knew I was too lazy to read books)

Have to take up an engineering course to succeed in life (I did take up Comp Engg, but out of love for the subject...I have to mention I was damn tempted to take up commerce and do my CA as well, that was a close second).

Have to write GRE/SAT and go to US for undergrad (Refused, told my parents clearly I wont write GRE or TOEFL as I dint wanna go to US - I knew India was the best even then)

Have to go to US after graduation for masters and to earn good money (Refused, even though I am not in India at present)

Have to be employed in a good company to do well in life (Refused till now...been in a smaller company than most of my peers, earn lesser than almost all my peers....but I feel guardedly optimistic about my life so far)

I am basically a very competitive person (I dont like to lose even against my 5 yr nephew, but I win something like 3-2 to make him feel better). So I felt that I can attain success in whatever I do, regardless of whether I am appreciated or boo-ed by others. The main reasons for going with the flow is the external pressures and internal apprehensions about failures. I feel that you must listen and assimilate the opinions of others, but must take your own decisions without being influenced by others. And you should not be afraid of failures (and I have met a few already). The best if you can learn from your failures and negative comments, and improve upon it. Its all about doing better than yourself. Not about doing better than others. In that case, you either have limited appetite for success or you get dejected and depressed.

Classic example is my poetry. Well, I wanna blog abt my poetry a little while later, so I will just say that you have to decide what is right or wrong for you. What is right for you may be wrong for others, but you have to realise its right to be wrong....as long as you are right according to your set of morals and principals and virtues and values. Dont get down, dont gets scared, juz do it ur way...Cos at the end of your life, you might have done better or worse than others, but im sure then that you will have the happiness of having lived your life the way you wanted it to be...

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The search has just begun !!!

The Power to Perform

I have always believed in some things...

1. Everything happens in life for a reason.
2. "sayings" or "Pazha mozhi" are words of wisdom gained through experience.
3.

Everything happens for a reason...even the Tsunami, which was not even of interest to geography teachers in India (whom I know taught me about trade winds, cyclones, monsoons, earthquakes etc). "Katradhu kai mann alavu, kalladhadhu ulagalavu..". Its just a nature's way of getting the balance right...Land re-organizes itself once in a while (like when our parents scold us to organize the things in our rooms). So, is our earth to blame? I would say its the nature's way of making sure the birth rate and death rate are consistent to what is optimal for sustenance. Ofcourse, its sad as a human to see all those lives being lost...

Some things to note from the tsunami...Life, death, compassion, collaboration are universal, regardless of religion, cast, creed, wealth or power.

Another such saying is that "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going". This is what this note is about.

When I thought about how, on the backdrop of the infamous "wall of water", the people themselves manage to overcome this natural disaster and literally start their life afresh. I purposefully delayed my thought process till after the cry and hue about the disaster has disappeared from the newspapers, cos sadly, public interest is like amnesia...doesnt last long..Ofcourse, the reason behind that is who would want to think and read about any bad news over and over again?

Stories emerge as to how a man lived 8 days on a tree bark drinking rain water and eating leaves and so on...success stories to inspire people and give them hope...

But what is that, that actually makes the difference....what is the similarity between a tsunami survivor and a marathon runner or a olympic gold medalist or a scientist trying to find out whether we can live on Mars and Titan? What is that we all have but only some manage to make use of, effectively?

Will Power...thats the power to perform. People always talk about it in motivational lessons, but I never really understood what is that exactly, as I always viewed it as something external that I can "acquire" through some techniques. But somewhere down the line, I realised that its the mind that controls our body, and it can make the body do seemingly impossible things, if you really want it to. People say nothing is impossible, because the mind makes it possible. "If you think you can, if you think you cant, you cant". You might think the body has limitations, it will become tired n stuff. Yes, the body has physical limitations, but the mind can really push those limits by a large extent. But the body can really only do something when the mind agrees to it. Do u think its impossible for u to stay awake for one whole week? Do you think its impossible for you to run a marathon? Do you think its impossible for you to become as rich as Bill Gates? It can all be done...

All these seem abstract, but in the context of the tsunami, people really think they can come up and live a life, even after they have lost all their near and dear and whtever they own. Because their minds have been convinced that the worst is over and that they can really make a living out of it. Each one of them have an amazing amount of will power.

I guess its dragging a bit too long, and I am getting hungry, so I will end this by saying that Everyone has will power, some use it lesser, some use it more....lets make things better by making knowing ourselves better and making use of whats inside and what we are in control of.

My grievances for the deceased and salutations for the survivors.

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The search has just begun !!!


Monday, January 03, 2005

Construction of an Instruction

I was juz walkin bak in the cool night breeze, when I thot abt the ppl im managing. I realised that there are 4 different ways in which an instruction is interpretted by a subordinate.

One type of ppl will see an instruction as an order, they will execute it to the letter in the easiest way they can, or mostly, the way they know it. They usually come back to you with a finished solution that leaves you shocked by its incoherence. A sub-sect of this group will face eternal problems with the project and will get back to you every now and then that will leave you frustrated to an extent you feel you can develop yourself.

The second type of ppl will view an instruction as a suggestion, and leave a lot of things as "Pending" as they feel that its the wrong way to do things or there are problems associated with it or they need further input. But the worst is that they wont get back to you on that until after the deadline. Mostly, whatever they have managed to finish will also be in a way tied down to the things they havent done, which will render the whole solution lame.

The third type of ppl will view an instruction as a request, they feel the superior will be honoured and grateful if they do the job for them. These kind of people usually give an unfinished job and after the deadline, will get back to you saying that they had "other more important things" to do. Often the other things that they mention leave you irritated and agitated.

The fourth type of ppl will view an instruction as an instruction and think about the best way of doing it. They will get back to you with potential problems and will give you suggestions and ask you for clarifications. Ofcourse, the ideal type for any superior.

So how to manage these guys?

In the short run, the first type will stick on but in the long run, will switch jobs. They are the people to "fill the spaces", so to speak. Note that its not the work they do but the quality of work they do that determines their passiveness in the organisation.

The second type of people needs a consistent monitoring, and constant reminder of how to go about doing things. Any let up on this and they will get back at you for giving incomplete instructions (ofcourse after the cause is lost)

The third type of people needs a reality check and an occasional pampering to keep them and their egos going. They MUST know that you are listening to their opinion. Else, there will be a revolt and the project is static.

The fourth type needs encouragement and plenty of listening. If they feel they are being listened to, it increases their productivity, else if they feel the project is going the wrong way, they wither away and get disillusioned.

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The search has just begun !!! (to incorporate these into practice)